1. Allah commands us to save ourselves and our families from the Fire of Jahannam:

(1) Choice of spouse should be on the basis of din (i.e. to be Allah-conscious and to practice Islam):

(a) Criteria for choosing a wife

1. [And marry such of you as are single and the pious of your slaves and female servants. If they be poor, Allah will enrich them of His Bounty. Allah is of ample means and All-knowing] (Qur'an 24:32).
2. "A woman is married for (one of) four reasons: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her piety; thus take the one who has piety lest your hands be thrust in dust" (Agreed upon by Bukhari and Muslim).
3. "The whole world is sheer enjoyment and the best of the world's enjoyment is a pious and virtuous wife" (Muslim).
4. "Each of you should aspire to have a grateful heart, remembering tongue and a believing wife who assists you in the affairs of the Hereafter" (Ahmad, Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah).
5. "A pious wife who assists you in the affairs of both your material and your religious world is the best treasure people can acquire" (Baihaqi).
6. "… amongst the things that make up happiness is a pious woman who, when you look at her, pleases you and when you are away, safeguards and protects her chastity and your wealth, and of the things that make up misery and heartache is a wife who, when you look at her, displeases you and lashes out at you with her tongue (i.e verbally abuses you) and when you are away, does not safeguard and protect her chastity and your wealth" (Ibn Hibban).

(b) Criteria for choosing a husband

• "When someone comes to you (those of you who have daughters) and you are pleased with and approve of his religious life (din) then let him marry (your daughter), for if you do not do so then there will be widespread corruption and mischief in the world" (Ibn Majah).

(2) The husband and wife should strive to reform and improve one another Islamically (especially the former in regard to the latter) (i.e. The husband should strive to raise his wife's level of iman, encourage her to perform tahajjud prayers, read Qur'an, perform the various athkaar (supplications) in their stipulated times, give charity, read good Islamic literature, listen to beneficial Islamic cassettes, choose pious and Allah-fearing (female) friends with whom she can form ties of sisterhood and exchange good conversations and purposeful visits and distance herself from bad friends and evil places)

(3) The home should be a place of thikrullah (remembrance of Allah) whether in the mind, on the tongue, through prayers, Qur'anic recitation, the learning Sacred knowledge, etc.

• [(This lamp/light is found) in houses which has permitted to be raised in status and that His Name shall be remembered therein. Therein He is praised in the morning and the evening by men whom neither trade nor sale divert from remembering Allah, establishing salaah and paying zakaah; who fear a day when hearts and eyes will be overturned.] (Qur'an 24:36,37).
• "The example of a house in which Allah is mentioned and remembered and the house in which Allah is not is mentioned and remembered is like (the example of) the living and the dead" (Muslim).

(4) The home should be a place of salaah (prayer and worship) i.e. a qiblah

(5) The home should be a place of spiritual development and training for its inhabitants in the form of tahajjud prayers, sadaqah, fasting, etc.

• "The Messenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him) used to perform salaah during the night and when he reached Witr salaah he would say (to A'ishah): Stand up and perform Witr salaah , O A'ishah" (Muslim).
• "May Allah have mercy on a person who stands up and prays at night and then wakes up his wife to pray and if she refuses he would very lightly and gently sprinkle water on her face" (Ahmad and Abu Dawud).
• "O Assembly of women: Give lots of sadaqah (charity) for I see that you will form the majority of the inhabitants of the Fire" (Bukhari)
• {A good idea is to have a charity (sadaqah) box at home so as to create a culture of giving and spending in way of Allah as well as engendering and fostering feelings of tenderness and compassion towards the drown-trodden and less-fortunate of the muslim community. In addition, the Messenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him), by ordering the women to give lots of charity, he is in fact suggesting to them how they can save themselves from being amongst the inhabitants of the Fire.}

 (6) Reading the appropriate supplications (athkaar) on entering and exiting the house

(a) On entry:

• "When a person enters his house and mentions the name of Allah Most High when he enters and when he eats, then shaytaan says (to his friends): 'There is no place to sleep and no place to eat (supper) for you here' and when he (the person) enters and does not mention Allah's name when he enters, he (shaytaan) says (to his friends): 'You found a place to sleep' and when he (the person) does not mention Allah's name at the time of eating (supper), he (shaytaan) says (to his friends): 'You have found a place to sleep and a place to eat (supper)'" (Ahmad).

(b) On exiting:

• "When a person leaves his house and says: 'In the name of Allah, I place my trust in Him, there exist no power and might except with Him', then it will be said: 'That will suffice, you have surely been guided, made self-sufficient and given protection'. Shaytaan will then incline towards him and another shaytaan will say to him: 'What can you (possibly) do with a man who is surely guided, made self-sufficient and given protection?'" (Abu Dawud and Tirmidhi).

(7) Frequent recitation of Suratul-Baqarah (Chapter Two:The Cow) in the house so as to drive the shaytaan away

• "Do not take your houses as graves, for shaytaan flees from the house in which Suratul-Baqarah is recited" (Muslim).
• "Read Suratul-Baqarah in your houses for shaytaan does not enter the house in which Suratul-Baqarah is read" (Muslim).
• "Allah Most High wrote a Book two-hundred years before He created the heavens and the earth, and which is with the Throne. From it He sent down two verses with which He ended off Suratul-Baqarah. When they (the two verses) are recited in a house for three nights, shaytaan does not (even) come close to it" (Ahmad).

(8) Teaching and educating the family members about Islam (Do's and don’t's, fiqh pertaining to women, as well as Tafsir, Hadith, etc.)

• [O you, who believe, safeguard and protect yourselves and your families from a fire whose fuel will be men and stones…] (Qur'an 66:6).
• {To safeguard and protect oneself and one's family from the Fire implies that one has to acquire the relevant and requisite knowledge. In other words, one has to learn what actions lead to the Fire of Hell (don't's) so as to avoid them, and what actions lead to the Gardens of Heaven (do's) so as to perform them. Since the command in the Qur'anic verse is one of obligation, it implies that the knowledge necessary for executing the command is also obligatory, in accordance with the legal maxim: "Whatever enables the execution of an obligatory act --and is necessary for the execution of that act-- is also obligatory".
• "Three people will have two rewards: … (the third is) a man who has a slave woman, whom he enlightens and does it well and whom he teaches and does it well, then frees her and then marries her, he will have two rewards" (Bukhari).

(9) Building an Islamic library at home equipped with good and authentic literature (for both children and adults) dealing with topics such as: Tafsir, Hadith, Aqidah (Islamic doctrine/creed), Fiqh, Islamic ethics/morals, Life of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), biographies of great muslim men and women, etc.

(10) Building an Islamic tape library (Qur'anic recitation, Dua's, Islamic lectures, Islamic songs for children, etc.)

(11) Inviting pious and Allah-fearing people as well as students of Din to visit you at home

• [My Lord, Forgive me and my parents as well as he who enters my house as a believer, and the believing men and believing women, and increase not the wrongdoers except in ruin] (Qur'an 71:28).

(12) Learning the Islamic injunctions and rulings pertaining to houses:

(a) Praying some prayers (i.e. optional) at home:

• "The best prayers of a man are (those that are performed) at home except the (five) compulsory prayers (Abu Dawud).
• "Perform some of your prayers in your houses for do not take them as graves" (Bukhari).
• "A man's voluntary services at home are greater than his voluntary services to the public, like the superiority of man's salaah in congregation over his salaah in isolation" (Ibn Abi Shaybah)
• "The best of the women's prayers is in the hearts and depths of their houses" (Tabrani).

(b) The house owner should lead prayers and his permission should be requested for his seat to be taken:

• "A man is not to be made to follow (in salaah) in places where he is in authority or in charge, nor should his seat in his house be taken without his permission" (Tirmidhi).

(c) Requesting entry:

• [O you, who believe, Do not enter houses other than your own until you have announced your presence and greeted the inhabitants thereof. That is better for you, that you may be heedful. And if you do not find anyone therein then still do not enter until you have been granted permission. And when it is said to you: "Go back" then go back for it is purer for you. And Allah knows what you do] (Qur'an 24:27,28).
• [Enter the houses by their doors] (Qur'an 2:189.)

(d) The unlawfulness of looking into people's houses without their permission:

• "Whosoever looks or peeps into the houses of people without permission then knock out his eye, and there will be no compensation nor retaliation" (Ahmad).

(e) The prohibition of sleeping alone at home:

• "The Messenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him) prohibited from doing (the following) things alone: for a man to sleep alone or travel alone (especially when the journey is perilous)" (Ahmad).

(13) Afford family members the opportunity to discuss family matters and make contributions and decisions in the spirit of mutual consultation

• [And their matter is one of mutual consultation amongst them] (Qur'an 42:38).

(14) Avoid raising family differences in the presence of the children i.e. do not engage in disputes and arguments in front of them

(15) Do not allow corrupt and shameless people into your home

• "The similitude of someone who sits in an evil environment is like a blacksmith in front of his furnace" and in Bukhari "The Blacksmith's furnace either burns your house or your clothes or you acquire from it a foul smell or stench".

16) Carefully observe and monitor each family member:

• Inquire about your children's friends and make an effort to meet and know them, what do your children bring with them into the house from the outside, subtly and carefully check on what they have in their drawers, bags, under their pillows and beds, where does your daughter go to and with whom?
• "Verily, Allah Most High, will ask every overseer about that he was put in charge of -- whether he looked after it or whether he neglected it -- so much so that a person will be asked about (how he looked after) his family" (Nasa'i, Ibn Hibban et al -- a good narration).
• Do not check on them in such a way so as to instil fear in them or cause them to lose trust in you, and also consider the age factor when meting out punishment

(17) Take special care of the children (i.e. teach them Qur'an and Islamic stories, permit them to have lawful fun and games, encourage useful and legitimate hobbies, arrange separate beds for boys and girls especially when they reach the age of puberty, play and have fun with them, etc.)

(18) Carefully plan and organise meal times and sleeping hours (i.e. get members to eat and sleep at the same time and do things together as much as possible so as not to break the unity of the family)

(19) Assess the work of the working wife in terms of need (Islamic or otherwise) and suitability

• [And stay in your houses …] (Qur'an 33:33).

(20) Safeguard information that is private and confidential to the family i.e. do not disclose/divulge family secrets (e.g. marital relations, family disputes, etc.)

• "The worse of people in station in the estimation of Allah on the Day of Resurrection is the man who was intimate with his wife and she with him then he divulges and publicises her most private secrets" (Muslim).
• [And if you fear a breach between them (i.e. the husband and the wife), then appoint an arbiter from his people and an arbiter from her people. If they desire amendment then Allah will make them of one mind (i.e. agree with one another). Verily, Allah is All-knowing and All-aware (Qur'an 4:35).
• "Let there be no harm nor reciprocation of harm" (Ahmad).

(21) Cultivating and generating feelings of kindness, compassion and mutual love in the family

• "When Allah desires good for a family (inhabitants of a house) He places kindness and compassion amongst them" (Ahmad).
• "When Allah loves a family He places kindness and compassion amongst them" (Ibn Abid-Dunya)
• "Verily, Allah loves kindness and compassion, and gives in the wake of kindness and compassion what he does not give in the wake of violence or anything-else (Muslim).

(22) Assisting the wife with the domestic chores

• "The Messenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him) used to mend his clothes and shoes and (in addition to that) perform the duties that men would (normally) perform around the house" (Ahmad).
• "He (the Messenger of Allah--Peace and Blessings be upon him) was an ordinary person--he cleaned his clothes, milked his goats and help himself" (Ahmad).
• "He (the Messenger of Allah--Peace and Blessings be upon him) served and helped his family and when it was time for salaah, he would go for salaah" (Bukhari).

(23) Playing and having fun with the wife and children

• "Why do you not marry a virgin and play with her and she with you and have fun with her and she with you (these words were uttered whilst addressing Jabir) (Bukhari).
• "The Mesenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him), on he returning from a journey, would be met and received by us, by me (Abdullah ibn Ja'far), Hasan and Hussain, and he would carry one of us in front of him and another on his back, until we entered Madinah (Muslim).

(24) Handling and rectifying wrongful and deviant behaviour at home

• "The Mesenger of Allah (Peace and Blessings be upon him), when he saw anyone of his household tell a lie, would ignore and avoid him until he makes toubah (repenrance) (Ahmad).

(25) Hanging the rod where each family member can see it

• "Hang the rod where each family member can see it, for that helps more in disciplining them" (Tabrani).

(26) Allowing non-mahram male relatives to be alone with one's wife at home

(27) Intermingling and free-mixing of men and women during family visits

(28) Having male chauffeurs and female domestic servants in the house

(29) Allowing hermaphrodites (bisexuals) into the house

(30) Television, especially those elements that are in violation of the Shari'ah as well as spiritually and morally destructive to the viewer, such as:

1. pictures of animate objects and picture making
2. music
3. immorality, nudity, illicit sex, pornography, etc.
4. obscene and foul language
5. incitement to fornication
6. negation of modesty
7. scenes of violence, sadism and the crime in general that is portrayed
8. the addictive influence exercised by television
9. encouraging the acceptance of aggression as a mode of behaviour
10. encouraging imitation of the crimes portrayed
11. the brainwashing effect of television, especially on the young
12. television stunts intellectual growth
13. it wastes time
14. it interferes with one's religious duties and one's necessary and important wordly duties

(31) Telephone (when using it for un-Islamic purposes, e.g. gossiping, backbiting, obscene calls, etc.)

(32) Displaying un-Islamic ornaments and non-Islamic religious symbols in the house

(33) Displaying pictures and statues of animate objects

(34) Smoking

(35) Allowing dogs in the house

(36) (Internal) decoration of the house (especially the kind that is excessive, extravagant and lavish)

(NB! Even though the original author did not elaborate on any of the points in this section for the reason that each one constitutes a topic on its own, I have nevertheless attempted to provide a more detailed discussion on television in particular because of its importance and seriousness.)

(37) Choosing a good location and design for the house (e.g. close to a mosque, in a suitable neighbourhood, separate quarters for male and female visitors, spacious and well-furnished, toilets not to face direction of qiblah, etc.)

• "Allah loves to see the effects of His bounty on his servant" (Tirmidhi -- a good narration).
• "Three things belong to happiness and three things belong to misery. As for the three things belonging to happiness: (1) a pious wife who, when you look at her, pleases you and when you are away, safeguards and protects her chastity and your wealth and of the things that make up misery and heartache is a wife when you look at her she displeases you and lashes out at you with her tongue (i.e verbally abuses you) and when you are away she does not safeguard and protect your wealth, (2) a riding animal that is obedient and loyal, and takes you to your friends, and (3) a house that is spacious and well-equipped and well furnished. As for three things belonging to misery: (1) a wife who, when you look at her, displeases you and lashes out at you with her tongue, and when you are away, does not safeguard and protect her chastity and your wealth (but squanders it instead), (2) a riding-animal that is obstinate and headstrong, so that when you beat it, it tires you and when you leave it does not take you to your friends, and (3) a house that is ill-equipped and not well furnished (Hakim).

(38) Choosing virtuous and upright neighbours

• "Four things belonging to happiness: …(the fourth being) a virtuous and pious neighbour, and four things belonging to misery: …(the fourth being) a wicked and corrupt neighbour" (Abu Nu'aim).
• "Seek refuge in Allah from a wicked and corrupt neighbour in a place of permanent residence, because the temporary and nomadic neighbour will soon move" (Bukhari in "al-Adab al-Mufrad").

(39) Taking care in making the necessary renovations to the house and acquiring whatever will make living comfortable and problem-free

• "Allah loves to see the effects of His bounty on his servant" (Tirmidhi -- a good narration)
• "Three things belong to happiness and three things belong to misery. As for the three things belonging to happiness: (1) a pious wife who, when you look at her, pleases you and when you are away, safeguards and protects her chastity and your wealth, (2) a riding animal that is obedient and loyal, and takes you to your friends, and (3) a house that is spacious and well-equipped and well furnished. As for three things belonging to misery: (1) a wife who, when you look at her, displeases you and lashes out at you with her tongue, and when you are away, does not safeguard and protect her chastity and your wealth (but squanders it instead), (2) a riding-animal that is obstinate and headstrong, so that when you hit it, it tires you and when you leave it does not take you to your friends, and (3) a house that is ill-equipped and not well furnished (Hakim).

(40) Being concerned with family health and taking the necessary preventative measures (athkaar and positive steps) for the purpose of safety and security